Thursday, September 10, 2009

Indian crabs...

When I was in college and my class was getting 'ready' for placement season, some 'expert's came for conducting mock interviews and some students clarified doubts/apprehensions personally or in front of the class. One question was about 'hobbies' mentioned in the resume. If someone does not have an 'exciting' hobby or rather no hobby at all, does it matter? Though personally I would be interested to know the 'non-schooling' part of any resume, I dont think current day 'recruiter's (even those who do the interview) are like that and it is not the 'game-changer' even for me. Basic technical skills are definitely needed but how much 'bandwidth' the person had in going beyond studies gives me an idea of how well rounded as an individual the person is. Do you know about 'traits' in C++? - as a question or even if answered, doesnt tell much about the candidate. As much as interviewers may think, they are 'evaluating' candidates in interview, I think candidates can also evaluate companies. Infact, that is what I do.

When Intel came to India, they wanted to become big in short time (atleast in headcount ;)). Intel is an honorable company. Texas Instruments was probably the first semiconductor MNC in India (started in 1985) and by virtue of their 'experience', some TI employees were given 'blanket' offers apparently-say on lines of 'twice what you get now'. In 2003, I was called by four people from Intel in one week, each having no clue of the other. That is how 'coordinated' Indians are - maybe management of Intel was unaware but management of Intel India should be aware and maybe couldnt cope with it. In the interview, the interviewer did not even know that Intel has a new office in Outer Ring Road and got offended when I asked whether I had to come to that office :( I repeat, Intel is an honorable company. Last week Microsoft called me (I dont know why). Microsoft is an honorable company and I thought like Texas Instruments, they may also NOT believe in my 'history' or 'geography' but see whether I can be effective in whatever I do. To begin with, the interviewer told me (why?) that he is 'new' to Microsoft (so?) and doesnt know much in C++. Firstly that tells more about Microsoft - asking a newbie to do an 'interview' is a silly decision. I can understand if Microsoft established its Indian operations in last month or even last year. They have been in India for quite some time and to ask someone who recently joined, to take interviews is ridiculous. It was a 1-question-knock-out I guess.
char *p;
p=&p;
strcpy(p,"hi");
printf("%s",p);
I said that it wont work because you cant write into 'address space'. The interviewer had apparently worked in 'embedded systems' before joining Microsoft and said that he can do it. Ok, he is 'better' than me (maybe using 'far' pointers, I dont know), but how does that test my 'programming' skills? I can understand if he asked me 'algorithm' or 'strategy to solve some problem'. This is not even trivia and I dont know what is the point in asking 'Kanetkar' trivia when probably is going to do such 'silly coding', especially in a software company like Microsoft. He wanted to 'complete' the interview but obviously didnt have any clue on how things work in 'other' world. He looked at my resume and asked how many seconds will simulation take - why seconds? what simulation? analog or digital? digital - structured or functional? - I would have liked if he followed Wittgenstein - What you cannot speak of, you must pass over in silence.. 25 minutes and I exited the campus. Microsoft is an honorable company. No pun intended, I am serious ;) Indians are 'single minded' - were, are, will be.

Is there an issue if a person who is recruited as a 'manager' starts handling interviews? Firstly I have an issue with recruiting 'manager's. I think every company has a 'culture' and 'personality'. It takes some time for any new employee (manager or otherwise) to adapt to the new 'environment', take the 'personality' if possible and act accordingly. I strongly believe in 'home grown' managers. The person should have worked in the same 'site' for some years, (get to) know how other employees are, how they react, what their 'opinions' are etc so that when made-a-manager is fully aware of the environment. Air-dropping PhDs or Indian expatriates is simply not going to work, unless the employees turn into stooges (I agree in India they often do). My sister thinks that I am spiteful on desis for no reason but I think I am not alone if other's comments are to go by. Indians are genuinely 'threatened' by 'others' and use 'stories' and 'claim to fame' to retort. If other person is having an i-phone, they are threatened; if other person is Tamil, they are threatened; if other person is fair skinned, they are threatened. They think such paraphernalia of others undermines their own (assumed?) 'importance'. It is no wonder that some Americans (of course, not desis) and Europeans referred my name to their Indian operations eagerly or readily but obviously I didnt hear anything from India. Even in my interview at Qualcomm, I felt that I knew more than the interviewers :o It is not surprising if they are genuinely threatened that my 'entry' could lead to their 'exit' and maybe to add 'I am a Tamil'.

To put the 'attitude' simply, I will help someone ONLY if I think that (s)he will not 'grow' above me. So if it is recruiting 'junior's, people will gladly take the next step. If it is recruiting a 'peer' or 'senior', then they are 'threatened'. No wonder, the first question in Broadcom was how my MCA (masters degree acquired nearly 10 years back) can help in semiconductor industry. If it helped for nearly 10 years, why shouldnt it help any further? I dont even want to answer such questions because the underlying motive is just ONE-UP-MANSHIP. Indian crab always prevents the other crab from going up. Is it that my countenance 'threatens' or 'predisposes' many Indians to interact with me with an 'anti' disposition? You dont know what could turn off in any Indian :( It looks as if everyone wants to make a point with me that they are 'better than me'. Apart from the fact, they dont need to (and they are not ;)), I am to blame in some sense that I dont even try to be 'pacifist'. If they talk some truckload of baloney, I am probably going to make a 'song and dance' about it and make sure that they know that I dont appreciate. Even among colleagues, I find very little 'professional' behavior in INDIA. In TI, one guy (as 'experienced' as me) talks about the biological cycles of one female colleague. In Nvidia, one colleague works from home (WFH) all the time. In NXP, one employee picks up 'contractors' in company provided car at UK and charging them money. Managers (atleast two that I know of or heard) in AMD believed/expected that if I go in bus, it should be in Volvo. Mind you, everybody including myself were getting helluva lot (atleast in my opinion) for what I call as 'silly work' since Jan 2000 in different companies. As Pulp Fiction goes,
if self-preservation is an instinct you possess, you better fuckin' do it and do it quick. I'm here to help. If my help's not appreciated, lotsa luck gentlemen.
It is only 'fair' that they should loook forward for the next opportunity to ease me off. My ex-roommate mentioned about a 'home-spun' philosophy of his colleague-which he christened as 'screwism' and it goes 'there are two kinds of people - those who screw others and those who get screwed'. Corollary is if you are of the first kind and dont want to screw others, you will be immediately put in the second group and screwed first. That pretty much sums up the Indian crab philosophy :)))

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